walking away isn't always walking away

some thoughts on resurrection and if it even matters to us today

May 04, 2025

Before you label yourself a deserter,

remember that the early followers in this story were Jews who believed that they were a part of a reformed movement within Judaism. They believed that Jesus was the one who was going to restore the glory of Israel, mostly by kicking out the Romans and restoring the majesty of a King lead Israel. But then, to the follower’s horror, they witnessed the religious leaders of Israel torture and execute their hope for change.

Jerusalem, which was once a symbol of a safe place for them, has now become a haunted place. An unsafe place. And they find themselves devastated and walking away from something they used to trust.

I can’t help but see the connection to many of us who find themselves walking away from spaces which at one point felt safe, but now have become de-sacralized. As I have conversations with people all over, I find that there are many daughters and sons of the church who are deeply disillusioned by what they discovered in their sacred spaces. The argument of some is that it is essential to stay in the fold no matter what, because it is essential to hand down the faith to the next generation. But if the faith that we are handing down to our daughters and sons reveals to be racist, misogynistic, obsessed with power, unconcerned with creation and the poor, people are not wrong to leave it. They are, in fact, on the right path in walking away.

But I don’t think this is any kind of strategized walk out. I don’t think this is any kind of revolution to usurp the powers that be. I think this is simply a reluctant response to deeply felt heartbreak. This is the painful walk of disillusionment. This is the despairing stroll of deconstruction. This is the necessary pilgrimage from that which has died and is being placed in a tomb.

We, of course, thousands of years on the other side of this story, see that the illusion of the disillusionment is that though they are walking away from Jerusalem, they are actually on a collision course with the Risen One. It’s in the process of moving away from that they find themselves in the midst of. Which begs us to ask the question, “Is walking away from that which is has shown itself to have failed possibly a work of the Spirit?”

So often the story God is telling with our lives is not the story we are telling about ourselves.

Sometimes the story of disillusionment and despair, a story of walking away, becomes a story of resurrection.

These two on the road to Emmaus are simply having a candid and honest conversation about their vulnerable sorrow. What they hoped for. What they believed in. What they witnessed died. What stopped working for them. It was in the midst of this conversation that the Risen One shows up and asks to join their conversation. “What are you talking about?” The Risen One walks with us in our vulnerable and sorrowful conversations. God is available everywhere, but God is especially present when people get vulnerable… whether it be in a temple, a roadside tavern, or simply walking down a street discussing their pain.

These two eventually end up walking back to Jerusalem with a renewed vision. They are awakened to the presence of the Risen One on that journey and it reframes everything they think that is happening. I can’t help but wonder if that may be our experience as well. That it is the necessary walk of disillusionment, the necessary vulnerable conversations about our sorrow, that allows us the renewed pilgrimage of resurrection back to what had been our hope. That it is only in leaving the old that we can return to the resurrecting new.

`May you SEE your disillusionment as the road to a whole new way of understanding.`

* This post inspired by Jonathan Martin’s musings in The Road Away from God

Stations of the Resurrection is a visual series contemplating what the resurrection of Jesus could even mean for us in the world today. The premise for these station meditations is that resurrection changes the way we see everything.

UPCOMING LIVE EVENTS

I’ve got some upcoming Low Show tour dates this month!

Info and tickets here!

Justin and I performed in Nashville last week and it was another fantastic show. Fantastic because of the audience that’s there that wants to participate. And fantastic because the show keeps evolving… which is what the show is about.

We’ve been hosting this show in churches on purpose. With Say Yes, I wanted to talking about Spirituality and Suicide in secular places. With this content we wanted to talk about depression and “benefit of hell” in religious spaces ; ).

If you want to know what that last statement means, you need to come to the show!